This is also my argument as to why Hoffman cannot be dead because of how they screwed up the canon in the seventh movie! You cannot give us SEVEN movies that completely follow canon and then throw it out of the window on a whim! So to me Saw VII is stand-alone, Alternate Universe, or a dream, NOT CANON!

Why Saw VII (Or 3D) Negates everything the rest of the series told us.


~*Includes mega spoilers from ALL movies*~

By Monica

Just a quick note before I start. If any Saw fan reads this and disagrees they can say so if they state it in a courteous manner. I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinions. If any one can point out flaws in my logic or my knowledge of the movie canon, go ahead and do it like a person with manners. I don't expect everyone to take this as gospel truth but I really don't want a bunch of "THIS SUCKS UR AN ASSHOLE" On my comment section. Thank You.

Over the years I have become a major Saw fanatic. Starting in 04 when I saw the first movie in theaters four separate times. I never dreamed there would be a second one, convincing myself that the first one was genius but would not get popular beyond cult status. When news of a second one came around

the following year I was happy but skeptical.

By the time they got to the third where Jigsaw died, I thought the movie was over. I mean I couldn't imagine how they could continue. The third was really well done and the twist was amazing. I had been around the IMDB boards for Saw since the third, and when news of a fourth came I was really wondering how the hell they were going to do it.

Needless to say it was pulled off brilliantly. I still remember Hoffman's final reveal, standing up from that chair and being like "What bitches?" and the chills I got. I wasn't always a Hoff Bunny, and at the time of the 4th I wasn't even sure of his character na

me, I just knew he was a fucking badass.

So I only saw the fifth one twice in theaters due to the fact that I was basically broke at the time and also the fifth one pretty much sucks. When it came out on DVD and through the help of message boards I was able to isolate the fact that I liked Hoffman FAR more than Strahm and became a Hoff Bunny.

I went to the midnight showing of the 6th. It was wonderful, the surge of emotions when I thought there was no way Hoffman would live and then seeing him escape, it was a rollercoaster ride. Also the plot was very interesting, it took on an issue that I have personally experienced and still do to this very day. The actors were great, the twist was awesome, the tests made me think. I am a little ashamed to say I saw that one in the theaters 7 times though like 4 of those times were at dollar theaters when it was on its way out of the mainstream be

fore it would get to DVD.

Then came the news that Paranormal Activity kicked Saw's ass at the box office that year (and really it's only claim to fame and genius was it's marketing campaign) so Saw VII would be the last one, though we were promised 8. We were assured that though they cut it down to seven films it would tie up loose ends and be fucking amazing. I was pumped.

After hearing that it was confirmed that Gordon (Cary Elwes) was going to be back, I lost hope...major hope. The only reason they would bring him back or he would even agree to it is if he got to s

ome how ruin Hoffman. I just knew that.

Despite claims of "This is Saw he could die in the first ten minutes" I knew logically that Elwes would not have returned if that were the case, because of his lawsuit with Lionsgate to begin with. He'd definitely want to be a part of the movie and do something with substance.

Before going into the theater for the midnight showing. My friend and I stopped to grab some food at a restaurant near the theater. At the end of the meal I looked at him and said, "Seriously, this movie is going to end in the original bathroom, and I am going to be pissed off." My friend, having seen all the movies but the third, had no idea what the hell I was talking about

until the end when I pointed out I was right. I came to this conclusion on my own, having stopped visiting the Saw boards altogether for about two months prior to the premiere to avoid every single spoiler.

So the movie was pretty much crap and undid just about EVERYTHING Jigsaw taught because the stupid Gordonites wanted Gordon to be the hero and wanted a good twist. I don't know what Gordonites were blowing the writers and producers but they must be damn good at oral...that or they had some really good blackmail material on a few of them to get it to go their way. Why the writers honestly thought this was a good idea is beyond me and proves they had given up by the end a

nd just threw some shit together and called it a day, being scared of being beaten by Paranormal nothing really happens but some loud noise Activity 2.

Now that I have set you up with how much of a fan I am, I think you can believe that I have at least a little credibility in giving some criticism to the seventh movie. I am not at all a casual fan, I own all the movies, have all the soundtracks...even have memorabilia from the 6th movie and a certificate of authenticity. I have thought about this for a very long time and have come to the conclusion that the seventh movie undoes everything Jigsaw stood for. Let me start at the beginning.

In the first movie, that featured Gordon and Adam, Gordon's test was to kill Adam before or exactly at the time of 6:00. Gordon failed his test, NO GORDONITE CAN SAY THAT ISN'T TRUE! It's stated in the movie, it's stated in the wiki, it's stated every fucking place ever. It is canon...his test was failed. Yes, he did end up shooting Adam but as we saw later, Amanda was the one who actually killed Adam so Gordon failed REALLY bad.

Now, cut to the seventh movie. Gordon is shown dragging himself to a

pipe in the hall and cauterizing his ragged stump of an ankle. Ignoring the fact that he so totally would have bled out (we have to go with movie logic here) yeah I can see him being able to do that as he would know to do it because he's a doctor and relatively smart. What doesn't fucking make sense is that Jigsaw helped him escape after the fact.

Jigsaw had a firm stance about passing or failing his tests from the beginning film until he died, when he was still a very main part of all the tests. Amanda passed, she didn't die. There were mention of a few other survivors, but not very many were show until the 7th, which is quite annoying. I guess Hoffman's shotgun to the chin encounter with Jigsaw was his test. I don't exactly count it as such, as I see that the RBT 2.0 was more of an actual Jigsaw test meant for him, it was just that the rules were erased by Jill when she placed it on his head. H

e escaped anyway, marking his badass status.

Now, even though Gordon cauterized his wound and stopped himself from bleeding out, it was shown he passed out. Jigsaw, would not have taken pity on him, as we were led to believe through the six movies, Jigsaw would have passed right on by the guy, locked him in the fucking warehouse and went on with his day. Jigsaw was there during Gordon's test, he knew Gordon didn't pass, therefore Gordon was supposed to die.

For example, Addison, in the second movie. She gets her arms trapped in the razor box. That kind of trap would not cause her to in

stantly die. At any point Jigsaw could have gone to the house and helped her, or even had Amanda take her out. Addison did not pass shit, she didn't even listen to the rules of the game, why would Jigsaw take pity on Gordon and not Addison? Gordon didn't do shit either, he didn't do what he was told, he still shot Adam out of desperation, didn't even mortally wound the guy....and all of this was done AFTER sawing off his own foot. How does Gordon deserve redemption more than Addison?

That I guess was my main argument, until I looked more closely. There are a few more things I would like to point out. Due to the Gordonite theory videos, they pushed the idea that Gordon was the one helping with the medical traps...anything vaguely i

nvolving some sort of surgery to get a key in someone's body or whatever.

Take the infamous clip of the cloaked figure limping to place the key in the victim's eye socket who was then placed in the venus fly trap. The Gordon is alive theorist have adamantly said that the cloaked man had to be Gordon and not Jigsaw because A) The guy limped (big giveaway) and B) Jigsaw would not know how to take out a guy's eye and put it back safely.

Hold the phone. Where do the rules state anywhere that Jigsaw gave a flying fuck if the man's eye worked again after the key was placed? In fact, looking at the victim's eye it seems to be purple and red indicating at least some trauma came to the guys eye. Also, though the man was shown looking in the mirror there was no indication to whether or not he could see out of that eye still, and anyway, to survive the trap the guy would need to remove his own eye anyway with a scaple, so Jigsaw wouldn't need to be overly careful with the eye in the first place, so why the fuck would he even need Gordon?

I want to pause right now and add in the fact that in the second installment the X-Ray showed the key to be behind the victim's eye, but if you watch in the 7th movie you can clearly see there was some sort of pouch of skin cut under the man's eye to hide the key, which was not the case in the original footage. Even still, I would like to add, one would not need to be a doctor to pull that off. Sorry, this paragraph has been added into the original I just wanted to point that out now before anyone could continue.

If you h

it someone on the back of the head hard enough, one or both of their eyes can pop out. Also, Jigsaw is not a complete retard. He may be a bit insane, I am not here to argue that he was some how justified in what he did to all those people, I am just saying maybe he knew how to basically get the eye back in there. This was, you know, when the internet existed. Besides the fact that he always managed to get anything he needed anyway, including medical supplies which Amanda stole for him and she was his apprentice when the second film happened. I have come to the conclusion that this procedu

re did not at all require a doctor because of what I have stated, a

s long as the man in question was not in danger of dying or becoming completely incapacitated before his test, it wasn't like the placing of the key and the removal of the eye had to be medically perfect.

Of course people will site other traps, someone pointed out to me the spike trap in four where the woman was pinned to her abusive husband with those long metal poles. I believe the argument was "Only a doctor would know about those specific points on the body." Not fucking true. Internet people! Oh and the fact that any average person can get their hands on medical text books if they try hard enough....some basic ones that have the same damn chart can be found in the public library. Why wo

uld Gordon be needed for that anyway? Cause he'd have to drive the spikes in with surgical precision? Fuck that shit, they even showed the damn machine that was used to get the spikes through. Why was Gordon needed for that?

Moving on, as I have numerous examples of other things from the rest of the movies I just don't want to bore anyone with my trivial arguments and assessments.

Saw VII really steps it up with two traps that a few people argue one would need medical expertise in accomplishing.The fish hook trap where the woman had a key on a string and in her stomach. The second one would be the whole thing about Bobby's teeth g

etting numbers carved into them and replaced back into his mouth, which is a far more improbable scenario than the fish hook in the stomach on a string but lets keep going with movie logic for now.

If stage performers can fucking swallow swords and a British guy can eat glass and metal every day for most of his life and not be dead, it's possible to swallow a fish hook that size with a small key on it, on a semi-thick thread and not choke or die. For one, there are over the counter throat numbing sprays that could help with swallowing large objects. There was no indication of if the lawyer had been knocked out when the hook was swallowe

d or if she had been awake. She would have had to have been awake anyway, I have had four endoscopies, that's where they jam a long tube down your throat with a camera on it to look into your stomach. You are not completely awake when this is done but you are not at all completely under. They just drug you, the drugs they give you are opiates and make you comply to directions rather easily without fighting. 99% of the time you won't even remember the procedure. (I am unlucky enough to have memories of my last one but that's another story for another time.)

They also have very strong medication they give you to swallow before they drug you to numb your throat even better than OTC stuff. That way you are not in pain when the tube goes down your throat. Depending on how the hook was placed in her mouth for her to swallow, along with the key, it could have gon

e down relatively easily. Since we know Hoffman has access to just about everything Jigsaw did, even more because he's a cop, he could have researched how to do something like this and just did it. Besides the fact, that we don't know how badly her throat was fucked up upon insertion, and once again, if the only thing that would kill her was scrapes to her esophagus that would become infected over time, it wouldn't matter because she could have gotten help as soon as she was out of the trap. Gordon was not needed to do this.

Moving on to Bobby yanking his teeth out. Okay that was just fucking retarded, t

here are so many errors with this whole concept that don't pertain to what I am trying to get across so lets just be short and say that Gordon was not an oral surgeon*. The end. Oral surgeons cannot perform regular surgery regular surgeons cannot perform oral surgery, and even if they can do it better than the average joe, Bobby's wasn't even aware that there was stuff on his they would have needed a really fucking GOOD oral surgeon to pull that off. Moving on.

Okay so let me play devil's advocate here and go along with the theory that, yes, Gordon was needed to do these things that anyone with internet access, a strong stomach, and in possession of medical supplies could do themselves. Fine I'll pretend tha

t's the case.

Hoffman would have HAD to know that Gordon was working for Jigsaw in some way. Even if he didn't know it was specifically Gordon he would have had to have known there was an accomplice, and would have logically been told it was a doctor. Hoffman wasn't stupid, I doubt he thought, "Gee I will dump these bodies in an empty warehouse and magically the traps will set themselves up and merrily I will go on my way." No! He

knew someone was helping him even if Jigsaw had instructed him to just leave the bodies somewhere and the medical stuff would be taken care of.

This means, his surprise when Gordon showed up is fucking stupid. He would have said something way different and his demeanor would have been way different. Even look at the fact that by the time he woke up in the bathroom he seemed to know who

Gordon was! Ow, my head hurts.

Now we have to take comments MADE by the directors and stars themselves. Tobin stated that in the second film he was the one in the scene as the cloaked man. He added the limp to give depth to the character of John Kramer who was FUCKING DYING OF CANCER! Also in the second movie, all parties involved had NO IDEA Elwes would be returning. The man in the cloak is Tobin bell, not Elwes! Also their body type and height differs noticeably so just...there was obvious back peddling going on.

In the Saw five commentary the "I know who you are" note left for Hoffman was stated to have been written in Jill Tuck's handwriting. It was Jill who left the note, as she would have been the mo

st likely person to know who Hoffman was anyway. Once again I will state at that point, no one knew Elwes was returning, so clearly they had a far different plan of where they were taking this until the variable that is Paranormal Activity burst onto the scene.

Given the above arguments, and the fact that I have debunked a lot of key issues, Saw Seven did ruin the franchise. My main complaint isn't even that Gordon is the hero in the end, it's the fact that it was so fucking contrived and seemingly came out of a pot smoking session is what bugs the shit out of me.

Had they come

up with a way better, far less obvious way to make Gordon the hero, and not used fan made bullshit ripped straight from the boards to pull it off....I think it would have been a nice shocker. The way is was completed, the horrible effects in Saw VII, the 3D, the blood that looked like strawberry milkshakes, the fact that Hoffman kidnapped like 50 people in one night, killed most of a police station with a knife, and set up a machine gun trap to kill the rest of the squad is just WAY too far fetched.

Jigsaw was cold, and he believed in playing by the rules and being fair. He did not break the rules because he felt sorry for people. They were all being tested for a reason, Gordon included. Saw Seven ma

kes him a hypocrite, completely and truly. Gordon was NOT the first person tested, he was NOT the first person to survive a test, and he failed. There was NOTHING special about him that would cause Jigsaw to help him like he did. What happened in the 7th movie was utter crap and I would just like to declare that from here on, I will not be viewing the 7th installment as canon. Just an alternate universe Gordonite circle jerk.

*I was informed by a fan shortly after writing this that the prop department screwed up with the placement of the numbers on Bobby's teeth but it was too late to redo them and everyone figured no one would notice.

Comments? Questions? Flames will be ignored.

CrimsonRegret 18:14, March 29, 2012 (UTC)Crimson


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